


Deciding the Fate of Ouranos

by StellarRequiem



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: HOW DARK?, Introspection, Kylo's relationship with his father, Spoilers for TFA, complicated relationship with his father, double agent Kylo Ren, how dark can ya go Kylo, not as dark as he thinks, shared backstory with Rey, soooooort of good Kylo Ren, that creepy sad scene with the mask, that's for sure, writing this hurt a little
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-16
Updated: 2016-01-16
Packaged: 2018-05-14 08:28:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 388
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5736676
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StellarRequiem/pseuds/StellarRequiem
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"He is nothing to me," Kylo says right before pleading with his dead grandfather's helmet for guidance.</p>
<p>. . . I call bullshit.</p>
<p>So, here's a drabble.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Deciding the Fate of Ouranos

"Help me," you say. There are tears in your voice that don’t manage to leave your eyes. But you can hear them, taunting. You're _weak_.  You're _failing_.   You will not complete your mission, the monstrous oath you took, with its moments of untempting redemption—a little girl, the lone survivor on a rainy salt flat outside a temple, screaming as you cut down her attacker. The same girl, screaming again because you left her, with a ship you paid for in blood, stolen from a thief stolen from your father, as payment for her life.  Supreme leader knows. Knows your weakness, and your light.

He saw that, where you said you would overcome, battling your breaking voice, what you felt was simply _no_. No, not him. For all the wrong he's done you, you still don’t want it to be him.

He will make you _fail_.

. . . He doesn’t _know_.

_“You sound like your grandfather,_ ” he'd bellowed at you once, some fight. He'd been appalled, aghast, and your mother had closed her eyes for so long and held her breath and two weeks later your uncle was visiting for the first time in months and she was saying _“You should train with Luke,”_ calling you, as she did, by a name that’s dead to you.

_“You sound like your grandfather.”_

_But that’s the point_ , you want to tell him. There are things you must destroy, because there are things you must protect.

Vader taught you that, and you need him to teach you again, because it's tempting, it's so tempting, now, in light of this—your father’s latest treachery— to do things by halves.

You could do the right thing. Destroy this base. Corrupt this weapon—you have the means to disrupt shields and send schematics and expose infrastructure and alert the traitors to order that call their ugly naivety good. You could, you could—it would be easier, all that. To destroy everything you’ve so painstakingly built before it can ever be used—

You need him to show you. To remind you. You are weak you are failing and you must be _defiant_ , you must do what is _necessary_ you must be _strong_. And so you _beg_.

“Help me,” you whisper. Help you kill, kill him, and you with him. “Help me, grandfather.”

_Tell me how to die._


End file.
